You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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