Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
