Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
