that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
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I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
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My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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