Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You can't just leave with hair like that
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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