im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
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