I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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