I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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