Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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