were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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