I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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