just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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