oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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