I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
