I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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