For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.