We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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