I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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