I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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