no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize