I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
