Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
