my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
