I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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