Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
