I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize