I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
