The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
