I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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