2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
