Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Just cropdusted the office
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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