Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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