jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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