I'm laying in your front yard are you home
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
