Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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