i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
