i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I think my vagina is haunted
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
