Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
