i would punch a child for taco bell
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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