it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
