god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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