It's like God shit irony all over that family
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
