Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize