I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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