ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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