You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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