it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
COCAINE IS GR8
I pour the whiskey from now on
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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