I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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