She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
