am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize