you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
